No Return
No Return: An Audio Drama by Kier Zhou
No Return is what happens when you give one person too much coffee, a microphone, and a world that won’t stop expanding.
It’s a fantasy series about gods, worlds, mercenaries, lost cities, and bad decisions… but mostly it’s about people trying (and failing) to make sense of the mess they’re in. The tone swings from absurd to sincere, from divine slapstick to quiet tragedy. Sometimes all in the same episode.
If Discworld got tangled up with The Wheel of Time and accidentally wandered into a Tom Sharpe novel, you’d be somewhere close.
The stories jump around the same world, exploring different but intertwined characters, stories and genres.
It’s made on a potato powered laptop, by a guy who clearly doesn’t know when to stop.
If you like things that are funny, sad, overcomplicated, and occasionally, accidentally, profound… you’ll probably like No Return.
But don’t take my word for it…
This show was nominated for Best Audio Drama at the New Zealand Web Fest and officially selected for the Cisco Web Fest, which is pretty good for someone who ran out of money to apply to any more festivals!
Here’s what listeners are saying:
“A journey through a creative mind like no other… I cannot begin to imagine how this creator keeps all his characters and plot lines straight, but it’s a marvel.”
“The quality and sound production are absolutely on point, but it’s the captivating writing and voice acting that keep you coming back.”
“Chaotic [affectionate]. Each arc has something unique - sometimes gut-wrenchingly funny, sometimes grounded — it keeps you on your toes.”
Extra lore, behind-the-scenes chaos, and stray thoughts at:
Episodes
103 episodes
9: Mageslayers: That Easy, Huh?
The Heist Continues!Chieftain Ondrei Anaheit- Mitch KayeUruk Guards- Madeleine Buttitta & Frankie VegaGorluk - Graham CapobiancoBiksune Ree- Taylor MichaelsRebe...
6: The Black Thorn: The Taste of Indignation
The Black Thorn goes to the post office.Written, performed and edited by Kier Zhou
5: The Black Thorn: Even In Perfection...
The Black Thorn tries to love...Written, performed and edited by Kier Zhou
4: The Black Thorn: Time to Redirect
The Black Thorn gets a beer.Written, performed and edited by Kier Zhou
20: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: I'd Like That Very Much...
The Orillian Regiment are leaving... The Vashjek Inaia have re-joined the Warlord's forces... and The Dayan Army is nowhere to be seen... What do you do when you know all is lost? Do you go quietly into the night? Or wi...
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3: The Black Thorn: It's Not Mine...
The Black Thorn is recognised.Written, performed and edited by Kier Zhou
2: The Black Thorn: I've Become Too Comfortable...
The Black Thorn makes his way home.Written, performed and edited by Kier Zhou
1: The Black Thorn: My Dark Hunger
The Black Thorn visits the countryside. Written, performed and edited by Kier Zhou
8: Mageslayers: Wait... What Do They Call It Here?
The Heist Begins!Chieftain Ondrei Anaheit- Mitch KayeUruk Guards- Madeleine Buttitta & Frankie VegaGorluk - Graham CapobiancoBiksune Ree- Taylor MichaelsRebel ...
19: Actual Play: The Fate of Daya: The Elusive Answers...
Salryn (and Jorvin) didn't just sit idle these long weeks. They did everything they could to unpick the mysteries of Vita's plan, the machinations of Alaric Sylwraith and the mysterious 'Lessor' who wrote to the diplomat ... but... with Vit...
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Finale: Wide-End: Less Than An Animal!
Part one concludes.The part of Anzhlo was played by the magnificent Matt EvansLady Yvonna was played by the luminous Lauren LittlewoodBrucco was voiced by the charming Christian Maclean-Mair<...
10: Wide-End: I Shall Deliberate...
It. Gets. Real.The part of Anzhlo was played by the magnificent Matt EvansLady Yvonna was played by the luminous Lauren LittlewoodBrucco was voiced by the charming Christian Maclean-Mair
7: Wide-End: Someone In This Family Needs To Dare!
Brucco and Ysenda get closer. Anzhlo's plans begin to come together. The Little Luiren Families are getting involved.Mr Kera- Tyler MoodyAlts MC- Brenna Anderson-DowdKaoru- GirunduuRuna- ...
5: Wide-End: Swimming in the Endless Sea
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!PatreonAnzhlo recalls his time in the camp and his run ins with Fuzhlo. Yvonna secur...
7: Mageslayers: Can We Get On With This Please?!
The Party arrive in Terrqas to begin their side quest... but not everyone is happy with how the Reach Arc concluded.Seilbh- Krissi WilliamsNikhol Ashorn- Cameron GergettPhaetra Coi- Danielle Thuen...
3: Wide-End: Let's See What All The Fuss Is About, Shall We?
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!https://patreon.com/NoReturnADBrucco returns to the camp and Lady Isolde attempts t...
1: Wide-End: Bloody Ungrateful Creatures
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!PatreonThe Isoldes get a surprise visit late in the night, Brucco finds the Rain Cha...
2: The 2teg: Are You Sure You're Not Just Really, Really, Really Ill?!
Wow, the 'old fashioned approach' really is much easier to follow. But... I mean... dead men showing up contrary to every rule in the book.. selective memory from the prime suspect... I'm not buying it.Samael Vine/Rayan/Matthias Alaric/...
1: The 2teg: It's Like Dranekian Theatre!
Thank the silent gods! We have finally dropped that insane story telling device (literally) and now we can get to the bottom of what is happening with some good old fashion interrogation!Commander Vine/Matthias Alaric/Rayan/Sau...
3: Anderkant 2: You Truly Know Nothing!
Min explores the temple. The Lessee has a fiery reunion. Herrand tries to walk a tight rope. Gnilfiet drinks some soup!Want to learn more about Anderkant, the Kabouters and the NoReturniverse? Why not check out
Bonus Content: The Last To Leave
The final days of the last age were filled with sadness...but for some... cosmic calamity was new...Across many worlds and many lands, amongst many creatures... The Fall brought many ends and many beginnings... these are the tragic word...
2: Anderkant: I Have No Idea What's Happening!
Are you finding Anderkant confusing and difficult to follow? Well how do you think Min feels?!Min finally makes it to Anderkant and encounters one of it's denizens. Gnilfeit makes gets more involved with the Lessee's plans... H keeps ma...
1: Anderkant 2: I Just Want Out...
If you like the show, why not become a patron on patreon, and get access to hours of bonus content!PatreonWho is 'H'? Who is The Lessee? Who is this enigmatic sister?...Well...actuall...
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Original release date 20 Apr 2024I've fixed this bloody thing three times now! Why is it being so weird!? I think we might have to drop this story telling conceit if it carries on any longer...Cole Lumbo - Chris RR B...
6: The Orillian 2egiment: That's The Way He’d Want To Go!
Gazi struggles to make friends with the Red Shirts... Colonel Wilifred struggles to put the evidence together... Gnilfeit and Third continue their battle... Tommo gets a touching moment...| Chermise Vermillion | Dragon...
